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HUGE RANT WARNING

I know this is a rant, but if I don't disclose it all here, I'm going to explode.

The week has made me want to take a dose of shotgun mouthwash. Worst of all, it's not even over. I was scheduled to work Thursday thru Sunday until I got a call at 9 PM on Tuesday by a manager, being asked to close for a sick co-worker. I needed the tips so I went in. I wasn't told literally none of the closing duties had been done. Needless to say, I was there until 3 AM. I stayed up literally all night on Wednesday night to help my Fiance study for a test she needed to pass, in order to pass the semester. I got about 2 hours of sleep today, Thursday, before going in to for my closing shift at work, getting out at 3:30 AM because it was extremely busy due to homecoming week. I have classes tomorrow that I have to attend if I want any chance at succeeding this semester. I also have to work the 8 hour closing shift tomorrow through Sunday. I get paid tomorrow but it has to go straight to pay rent and bills.

That's not even the half of it, though. My Fiance's sister, who is up to her eyeballs in debt for a car she couldn't afford, and her boyfriend are staying the night at our apartment tonight because they didn't pay their electric bill. Speaking of electric bill, let me interject here, I pay the one for our apartment, and yet I get yelled at when I tell people they need to turn off the lights, computer, TV, etc. when they're not using them, and furthermore, the repairman from our realty company came today, without warning, and winterized everyone's A/C and pilot-lit their gas heaters in our entire complex. It was 80 degrees outside today. I was about to burn down the Realty Office, to say the least, if I didn't have to go to work. It made me decide not to renew the lease when December comes. I will be looking for a small house to rent.

Anyway, I was told they would not be staying another night, but not because my Fiance told them they couldn't, it's because my Fiance's younger brother is coming down to visit for the homecoming game and "we" promised him a place to stay.

I'm pissed off at this for a few reasons. I was never formally asked about any of this. It was always "(Fiance's sister's name and boyfriend) are staying here tonight" and "It's okay if (Fiance's little brother) stays here for the game, right? I don't want him to stay with (Fiance's sister and BF) because they might smoke pot with him there."

Interjecting again, this ties into something else I realized. All my "friends" here are actually just friends by association of my Fiance. I really don't have any friends in this city. But it pisses me off that the largest social gatherings here happen while I'm working, and I'm tired of being lied to that "they're you're friends, too." They never voluntarily initiate conversation, electronically or physically. A recent weekend when my Fiance went out of town, I spent the entire weekend working, sleeping, and cleaning. Not a single "friend" of mine ever contacted me or showed up at the door the entire weekend.

Back on subject, my answer should have been: No, they're not staying here. They still fucking owe us money. I don't give a shit. AND Who cares? I like to smoke pot. Maybe he does as well.

A small note, here. I do smoke marijuana occasionally. I am very sensitive to it, unlike my Fiance, who doesn't get a high from it at all. Even with shwag, it only takes me a few hits to feel good. My Fiance and I got into a related argument over it this weekend. She's fine with me smoking, but doesn't want it anywhere inside our apartment. I can understand this, but I believe I should be allowed to keep a very small amount for personal use. I'm not going to lie. I feel much less depressed and more energetic for days on end after I take a few hits of something. I'm just going to have to concede that she doesn't understand it as I do and get over it.

To sum it all up, here, I'm just feeling used, rushed, fractured, and I'm literally sick (flu) on top of it all right now, and I hope it'll get better.

The book Impossible Motherhood is coming out soon, or is already out, I dunno. I'm planning on buying 2 or 3 copies.

Most of America's mothers will go to work tomorrow instead of spending the time providing educational, loving, and supportive means in raising their children.

but remember...

NOBODY FORCES YOU TO WORK FOR THEM!!

In case you were wondering, I have not deleted my previous post, but I have made it private.

I decided, to keep arguments from spiraling into non sequitur ad infinitum I need to slow down the crossfire. I will be screening replies so that this blog's chief administrator can stay on top of the information being dispensed.

I will only deny posts that are hateful or nonsensical, but I will not block replies that exposes a reader's stupidity to the rest of us.

Also, I may take a break from this blog for a while. School is in high gear, and attempting to earn this civil engineering degree is a bitch.

I may just simply take my time in responding to the shitstorm of replies that have accumulated in just one day, but we'll see what happens.

I have encountered the same problem as Andrew Austin, and I'm gonna copy his post on the issue.

From Freedom and Reason

Is this the Mother of all Dumb Arguments? Could Very Well Be.

I am being criticized for my criticisms of capitalism on the ridiculous grounds that I live in a capitalist society. It's a bizarre criticism, but I have faced it before.

The basic argument is that because I buy things I support capitalism. I don't know why those who make this argument do not immediately recognize how completely absurd it is.

True, I support capitalism in a material sense when I buy things, but that's not support in the sense that I promote capitalism or that I have a desire that it succeed. I support capitalism materially because I am forced to. I live in a capitalist society by misfortune of birth. I didn't choose it.

Slaves supported the system of slavery on these grounds, since their labor is what made the system of slavery possible. Slaves accepted food, housing, medicine, indeed everything from the slave owner. They had to. They had no choice. It's called surviving.

Likewise, I have no choice under capitalism but to buy food and medicine, pay rent, and so forth. This reality of the situation is in fact one of the central reason why capitalism and every other exploitative system is wrong.

If I were forced to contribute my labor to a society in which the workers owned and controlled the means of production, that would be one thing. Every society in history has required those who could work to work for the betterment of the community. "From each according to his ability to each according to his need." I would even settle for "From each according to his ability to each according to his contribution," with some social provision for those who cannot produce enough for themselves, of course (you know, children, the disabled, the elderly).

But under capitalism, I am forced to contribute my labor to, and obtain necessary items from a class of non-workers who monopolize the means of production. Capitalism is in essence a system in which people who don't work live of the labor of those who do - and they live even better than the producers do.

Being forced to contribute to such an unjust arrangement is what's wrong with capitalism.

It isn't supporting capitalism to be forced to live in it any more than prisoners support prisons.

Frankly, I would be embarrassed to have made such a stupid argument.

I completely agree with Pat on this one. 100 percent.